All good!

Things are all good at the moment! I finally went back to the clinic to get the band adjusted and thankfully it is much better now - I am able to eat salads and breakfasts again which are really important to me. Salads of course because I want to get the vegies into my diet and breakfast because I had not been able to eat it and then would feel sick and seedy for the rest of the day - booooo!!

I have to admit that this week has not been the best health wise but I have been soooooo busy at work and so exhausted when I got home that it was all I could do to have a few mouthfuls of food and then fall in to bed. I am still waiting for the second trimester burst of energy that is supposed to be coming my way but so far, no luck - it is not anywhere in sight!!

I am still having the weekly scans and at the moment all is really good, the baby is growing nicely and I am feeling pretty good apart from the fact that I have been mega tired and I have been getting bouts of dizziness lately - the OB has said it is because I have low blood pressure.

We have been having hot weather forever here in Melbourne and I have to say, I am sincerely over it!! Normally I love the hot weather but it has been really knocking me around! It is supposed to be Autumn now but it still feels like summer!

Tight Band...

Well, I have to admit it - the band is too bloody tight. I have felt this way for two weeks but it has been very up and down so I hadn't been too worried about it. Now it is consistently causing me a bit of grief so I am going to have to get something done about it. Also, the problem now is that I am getting pain when food is going down - this is a new thing, it hasn't happened to me before so I am keen to get it checked out. I am going to go in for an emergency appointment tomorrow.

I have been a bit worried that the baby and I are not getting enough nutrition with the band being so tight and I have thrown up a few times which has not just been pleasant as it has been not just food getting stuck but has turned into normal morning sickness throwing up - blech. I am hoping that it will all be better after tomorrow.

Had a pretty good weekend, though I am very, very tired now because I had a lot on. Got my tax done of Friday as well as having the first of the weekly ultrasounds which showed everything is going well. Saturday we went to country Victoria to visit my sister in law and her husband and then today (we had a public holiday in Melbourne) Jen came over to hang out. I know it doesn't sound like it was that busy but honestly, I am totally exhausted and not looking forward to work tomorrow, just because I am so tired - hopefully this week will go quick!!

I'm back and............I'm PREGNANT - whoo hoo!!

Is anybody out there still reading? I hope so!

Okay - first let me apologise for me lack of blogging over the past couple of months. As you can see by the title, I am pregnant - YAY and that is the reason I haven't been blogging - I wanted to get to a safer part of the pregnancy before I announced it to you all. I am now 13 weeks pregnant and we couldn't be happier about it. As many of you know, the main reason that I got the band in the first place was to help IVF. We have been trying for years and now to be pregnant, well, I just couldn't be happier.

So, some updates - what has been going on?

Firstly, the pregnancy is a high risk one because of the multitude of issues that I have. I am seeing a high risk OB and so far everything is going well. The first 12 weeks were tough with the morning sickness and I realised that I don't really know the difference between feeling nauseous and feeling hungry - certainly one of my previous issues, that's for sure! Thankfully the majority of the morning sickness has now passed though I am still pretty tired. Gosh there were some weekends where I didn't even go outside I was feeling so sick and exhausted! I am hoping that I will get some of that second trimester energy soon - our house needs some organising before the baby comes and that is for certain!

I have found that many of the feelings that I had before I had the Lap Band placed have come back. I started to document the growing stomach from 6 weeks onwards and my mind was in such a bad place sometimes that I felt that I was back to my heaviest weight and I would be very surprised to see my 'not too bad' figure in the photo's that the husband has been taking. I always thought I would be one to cope fine with putting on weight in pregnancy because I had lost and gained weight so many times before but I have had to handle some pretty serious panic attacks about my weight over the past couple of months. I feel I am getting better and better though.

Being pregnant with the band is interesting. My OB's first question when he knew that I had a Lap Band was 'have you had all of the fluid taken out?' - to which the answer is a resounding 'no'. Though I did tell him that I was able to eat well and I could always go back to get more taken out if I need to. I haven't in actual fact had any fluid taken out since before Thailand and have not had any put back in. It has been tighter some days that others but generally it is at a manageable level at the moment and I am certainly able to eat a variety of foods and get enough calories in for myself and the baby. The most important thing to me at the moment is the health of the baby and myself so I am concentrating on eating as healthily as possible. That doesn't mean that I haven't had some slip ups, I certainly have but I am trying not to beat myself up over it and now that the morning sickness is abating, to be more organised with healthier options. I am having a big cookup tomorrow to be organised so I have healthy snacks available and food in the freezer in case I can't be bothered cooking (or the smell is too revolting - I tell you, I have a bionic nose at the moment!!).

An interesting side effect of being pregnant and my changing shape is that I don't know how the hell to dress!!! All my life I have been a classic pear shape and I have become pretty adept at dressing to enhance my good points and skim over my not so great ones. Now that I am pregnant, my boobs have gone up two sizes, I have no waist and of course, my stomach is growing! Any pointers that any of you have to dress appropriately for the 'looking fat rather than pregnant' stage of pregnancy for pears shapes would be most appreciated!

Another interesting side effect of the pregnancy (which of course we all would expect) is that the hunger is back. I had so long without really feeling any hunger, to now get hungry again is a bit strange. Sometimes I still panic because I think 'oh crap I feel sick' and then I realise that I am just hungry but I do have to be careful not to get too hungry because I do actually feel quite sick if I do feel very hungry. It is an intesting time to look at hunger - previously, I have had a lot of trouble with hunger - I have feared it. After the band, there was still that fear though I always have the option that I can fix it by going to get a fill. Now I am working on dealing with my fear of hunger and one of the ways is to realise that it is a way of nurturing the baby.

Emotionally I am finding it quite tough. Tough because I am constantly worried which I suppose is normal after having so much trouble getting pregnant in the first place - that, however, does not make it any easier to take. I tell you, my emotional coping strategies have been put under some serious strain of late though I am happy to report that I am not emotionally eating anywhere near what I used to. I go to weekly ultrasound appointments (because of the high riskiness of the pregnancy) from this Friday onwards so that should be able to alleviate my fears on a weekly basis (I hope!).

Great to be back, gang - boy do I have some reading to catch up on!!

Happy New Year!!

Happy New Year to you all!!! I hope that you have had some fun celebrating and made some resolutions! I haven't actually made any resolutions as yet - I have been a bit busy with getting back from Thailand and then celebrating Christmas and such! I am sorry to have been a bad blogger of late, that will certainly be high up on my resolutions (though I am not a fan of calling them that, I like to call them goals) to be a better blogger!

Firstly, let me talk about Thailand and let me say, I heart Thailand!! This was my third trip and it was an absolutely fabulous one again. My husband and I stayed in Bangkok for 8 days and mainly we shopped and ate and slept and swam and shopped again - there are some great bargains to be had, that's for sure! We had a great day trip to Kanchanaburi where we went on a boat trip down the river, rode an elephant, went on the hell fire pass on the death railway (Burma - Thailand railway that was built by POW's in the Second World War - many allied troops died in the building of the railway) had a yummy lunch and then went to have a look at the Bridge on the river Kwai. It was a wonderful day trip.

For the remainder of the holiday we stayed at a very luxurious resort in Hua Hin (3 hours drive South of Bangkok) and basically relaxed. Honestly, I can say that I have never been more relaxed after a holiday - I had so many massages and treatments that they pummelled all of the stress right out of me - I loved it!!

Eating wise - I had quite a bit of fluid taken out of the band before I left because the last thing I wanted was to get sick and the band close up - booooo! The good thing was I was able to eat things that I hadn't been able to eat for awhile - mmmmm, steak, lots of chicken, salads and even small amounts of bread. I hate to admit it but on our honeymoon, I put on around 5-6kg's on our 2 week trip to Thailand and I am unhappy to say that I did put on weight while we were away, it was around 1.5kg's which I consider pretty good - I lurve the band! I wasn't great with my food but since I have been back I have been eating alot more healthier which has made me feel alot better! I am back to see the wonderful Doctor Caroline on Thursday so I am sure an adjustment will be happening and I will be straight back on track!

So, a brand spanking New Year for us all - let's all wipe the slate clean with old behaviours and start off the New Year making some long lasting changes - good luck to all of us!

4 sleeps to Thailand!

Whoo hoo!! I am SOOOO excited about going to Thailand, it is going to be fantastic!! We are going to Bangkok for a week and then to Hua Hin on the coast. The main things that are on the agenda are: sleep, reading, spa treatments, eating, swimming and shopping - it is going to be a great holiday. The good thing is that we get back on Christmas eve.

I have been really busy with work lately which has helped pass the time though the last week felt like it took bloody forever. I am pretty organised, so much so that I have looked up the movies on the flights, the movies that are on at the multiplex near where we are staying in Bangkok, converted all of the prices of the spa treatments to AUD - gosh, I am really looking forward to it.

The husband and I have to go to my Mum and Dad's place tomorrow to put up a fence so the dog won't be able to get out when we go. Then I am going to do a big clean on the house and pack - I am very organised!!

Band-wise, it has been a bit up and down of late and I am going to have some taken out on Wednesday before we fly out that night. It has just tightened up again today, I think because of a bit of stress and sometimes that really drives be crazy about the band. Though, I still absolutely love it all the same - my weight has stayed the same the last few weeks which I am really happy about - I have never really had stable weight, well, not for a long time anyway.

I am also looking forward to Christmas this year. Last year was a bit of a disaster as I hadn't really gotten used to eating only a little bit of food so I really pushed limit - I am looking forward to a calmer Christmas this year!!

Some good things in life.....

I have been thinking about my trip to Perth and how different it was having the band. Firstly, I would not have gone if I was weighing at my heaviest, now way. There were too many people that I had not seen for a long time and going to the beach, I’m afraid not. This time, I went without thought – how nice is that? I wasn’t worried that people were going to be thinking ‘my god, she looks terrible’ – partly because I have lost weight but also because I am a lot more confident in my own skin and don’t particularly care what people are thinking about me these days.

Due to my blood clotting condition, I always wear the thrombosis socks on the plane. When we flew to Perth, I put them on once we were on the plane. We went on one of the cheapie airlines and you know how close together the seats are right? Well, I was able to put my socks on in my seat, no problem – 18 months ago – I would have had to have gone to the toilets to put them on, no way in hell would I be able to put them on in my seat!!

I also am notorious for putting mega amounts of weight on whilst away. On our honeymoon for two weeks in Thailand, I put on 5kg’s (11lbs) in two weeks – I mean, how is that even possible?!!?? Anyway, when I got back, I was a bit worried about my weight because I had had some fill out and had been able to eat a little more. Happily when I got home, I was the same weight – this was a huge relief and a massive success for me!!

Gosh I love the band!! 9 days to Thailand, people – I am SOOOOO excited!!

I'm Back!

Well, I am back from Perth and we had a wonderful time!! It was a pretty relaxing weekend just pottering around and going to the husband's cousin's birthday celebrations!

The weather was a little disappointing, quite chilly so we didn't get to have a swim until Sunday. The beaches in Perth though, my goodness, they are surely some of the most spectacular in the world - absolutely gorgeous!

The good news is that even though the flight tightened up the band a little, it wasn't too bad and I have been able to eat a bit but not too much. Despite my resolution not to weigh myself, I did this morning and it is all good, it has stayed the same - yay!

Now I have 15 days until we go to Thailand - I can't wait!! There is still alot to do and lots to get done at work but I am really, really excited for Thailand - whoo hoo!!

Perth bound!

Okay – I had an incident last week. As a result of some medications that I have been taking, I had to get an emergency appointment to see the wonderful fill doctor, Caroline! All of a sudden, I started to get toxic heartburn and I was unable to eat anything nor drink very much. We have been having a pretty big heat wave here over the past week or so with record temperatures for this time of year so the dehydration was horrifying!

I ended up having .4 taken out of the band and even then it took another 36 hours to be able to really eat anything other than liquids. I am still not able to eat a great deal but I have been able to have lots of liquids, thankfully because the heat has continued unabated all weekend.

I have to say, I get nervous getting fluid out of the band – it takes this kind of situation to realize just how much I rely and trust it which is a good thing – my resolution in the new year is going to get that level of trust and reliance on myself – then I would be unbeatable right?!!? I am very glad that I got the fluid removed though, it would have been a disaster if I hadn’t of with how hot it’s been over this weekend!

I have been ultra, ultra busy at work with a big project coming in to land over the next couple of weeks but the biggest news this week is that I am heading West people – heading over to Perth with the husband for his cousin’s 30th birthday. I am really looking forward to it because I have never been there before (apart from a 4 hour wait when I was on the way to Africa!). It will be nice to be right on the beach and have some serious relaxing – I can’t wait!!

Two weeks after that, we are off to Thailand and we don’t get back until Christmas eve – I am so excited for the Thailand trip, we had our honeymoon there and absolutely LOVE the place! I think I will have to get more fluid out for the trip – the last thing I want to happen is not to be able to eat there or to get something stuck – not the place for that!!

Anyway, will chat to you after Perth!!

Unsettling band changes!

I am happy to tell you that my weight finally dropped down, yay - I was very pleased I can tell you though due to personal circumstances, I am not going to weigh myself for the rest of the year and be happy with maintaining my current weight (which is only 7kg's away from my healthy weight range and a whisker away from 40kg / 88lbs). If circumstances permit - I will start back on the weight loss journey again in the new year. This is actually really exciting for me as I have never intentionally tried to maintain a weight, I have always been trying to lose weight. I am quite excited to see how the band works to maintain my weight!!

Speaking of the band, it has been a little changeable the last week. Firstly, I had felt that it had loosened off a whisker - which was good news for maintaning because it has been pretty tight. Then yesterday it tightened up like no tomorrow, tightened more than it has been for awhile which is a bit annoying. I am going to wait a day or so and hopefully it will loosen off, if not, I am off to get some fill taken out cos I am struggling right about now.

Sometimes the band annoys me and this is one of those times but I am just going to have to work with it - onwards and upwards as they say!!

Exercise galore!!

It’s funny when you think that you are not getting anywhere with your weight loss and then something comes along to make you realize that you have changed significantly. This can come in many forms, a friend who you haven’t seen for a while, a comment from someone at work, a look back in your journal or blog or a gym assessment. For me, I had felt like I had been toiling away for the past few months without very much reward. I definitely have felt that my clothes were looser – I am pretty much in a size 12 (pants, much smaller up top) now which is very encouraging but the scales felt like they had not been moving for months and months.

I had a gym assessment last week and I am not sure how long it had been since the previous one but I think it was around 4-5 months. I had lost 16kg’s and mega inches everywhere – 8cm’s off my waist was a memorable one. It was a great wake up call – it made me feel rewarded for the months of training that I have been putting in.

Still, the weight loss is coming pretty slowly now. I still have 8 kg’s (17lbs) to get to my healthy weight range and whilst I would love to get there quickly and start to maintain, for the most part I am quite happy for a slow weight loss as long as it keeps on going down. I still have days when I’m frustrated about it but for the most part, I go along pretty well.

Jen and I had our second tap class this week which was so much fun again. I am seriously unco and have trouble even getting the most basic steps but honestly, we laugh and have a good time and I tell you, that’s how I like my exercise!!

I am having a good exercise week this week – I feel like I am finally over the cold that has plagued me for the last month, so I am really getting in to it again – yay!! I went to the gym on Tuesday, did the tap class on Tuesday, did a boxing class with my husband last night (holy cow, that was tough!!) and went to the gym today. All in all, I am feeling really good.

We are going to Perth for a long weekend in November – I am looking forward to getting some sun and swimming in the beach and then we are off to Thailand in November and I will be having almost a month off work – am SO excited, I can’t WAIT!!